Judgement

A little melan, little choly.

As creatures of intellect, we are bound to constantly categorize the items in the world around us at least subconsciously.  We have to in order to interpret the world.  That is what perception is.  Because of this, judgment is impossible to avoid.  This trend of ‘don’t judge me’ or even ‘you have no right to judge me’ is absurd.  Yes.  The goal here is to not be judged unfairly or harshly, but, on the contrary, you really are in no place to make demands of some one’s categorization system; it is how they make sense of their reality.

Now, I believe in objective reality.  You may not, but it helps your argument, if you have ever felt the need to say, ‘Don’t judge me.’  It is clear to me that many who defend their selves with this phrase are just bitter about people not appreciating their flaws.  To that train of thought, I say, ‘So what?’  No one has a right to friendship, and you do not get to decide when you have earned an other’s companionship; only they do.  Saying, ‘I don’t like you; please go away,’ is not mean.  Saying, ‘You’re an ass hat’ is mean. You are entitled to no one’s attention. Being told the truth about how some one feels about you, whether positive or negative, is just as courteous as any compliment.

With that out of the way, I say again that I believe in objective reality.  From this perspective, I believe that there are true judgments of people and false judgments of people (in fact, the dictionary definition of the word refers to evidence-based decisions).  No one wants others to believe falsehoods about them.  Do they?  Some argue that propagating falsehood is ethically wrong, and we should be able to stand up for what is right.  Right?  Ah, but are you prepared to rock some one’s world, to turn their system for perceiving their reality up side down just so that they may judge you the way that you want them to?  Your choice is to do that or to find friends in like-minded individuals.

Judgment has a negative connotation that only serves to confuse.  Every one has a first impression of every one else that they meet.  If you have ever heard some one say, ‘I don’t judge people,’ they were a liar.  Building a box full of ideas, though they may be false, in order to identify a person is normal, fine, and necessary.  In order to understand the true nature of a person, learn their habits and how those habits interact, we must have a starting point, and that starting point, as well as every modification to those ideas in the box that represents that person in our mind and the possible ‘fair’ truths about them that we may eventually come to understand, are all judgments.  A judgment is a little deeper than an observation, but knowing a person is in great part an emotional experience, so we must not only see but understand and feel how we relate to that person.  Saying, ‘I don’t want to be judged,’ is the equivalent of saying, ‘I do not want to be understood or related to.’  If you are a monk living in isolation, then good for you, but otherwise learn to deal with the categorization-driven minds that humans have.

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